Chapter 8

 Bernie was not happy.

Actually, scratch that. Too much of an understatement. Bernie was asbsolutely furious. Seething. Incensed. Irate.

Leo could not remember having ever seen anyone so angry.

Yet his Grandad’s rage was not aimed at him. It was directed purely at Pete.

“I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve told you to not bottle tackles,” Bernie snarled at his shamefaced son. “Your cowardice has just cost us a goal! You need to toughen up, my boy. You think that was a bad tackle, then you should see what I used to have to put up with back when I was your age! You wouldn’t have lasted five minutes.”

Instinctively, Leo shuddered. Those words sounded hauntingly familiar.

As Bernie continued to berate his son, most of the other boys did their best to avoid the steely glare of their fuming coach. Some looked at the grass. Some at the sky. Some at each other. Anywhere was good enough, as long as it didn’t attract their coach’s eye. 

They clearly sympathised with Pete. Felt bad about how his Dad was so unceremoniously laying into him. Although not enough to actually do anything to stop the ranting man’s verbal onslaught.

Leo noticed Matt’s gaze fall upon him. The curly-haired boy’s expression clearly conveyed his displeasure. He knew exactly whose mistake had really led to the goal. 

If Leo had just booted the ball up the line, then the ref would have blown for half-time, Deansview wouldn’t have scored and Pete would have avoided the severe tongue-lashing he was currently receiving.

Leo already felt guilty. The disgusted look on Matt’s face made him feel even worse.

There was no way around it. He was going to have to apologise to Pete. To his future Dad. Leo had tried to avoid talking to him so far. He’d found it impossible to get his head around the strangeness of the situation. Now he was left with no other option. It simply wasn’t fair to let Pete shoulder the blame.

Leo would also have done his utmost to avoid the challenge. So, he guessed, would the rest of the boys. Well, maybe not Jamie. He seemed to relish the physical side of the game.

There was simply no way that Bernie should be blaming Pete for the goal they’d conceded.

Once the half-time teamtalk was over – or, more accurately, once Bernie had stopped calling his son every disparaging name under the sun – the boys made their way back to their positions so that they could start the second-half.

No one spoke to Pete. Or offered him any words of encouragement. Not one of his teammates told him that the goal wasn’t his fault. Or urged him to keep his head up and ignore what his Dad had said. 

The truth was that none of the other boys knew quite what to say or do for the best. So they did nothing. Just left him alone.

The harsh criticism had upset Pete. That much was clear to see. He tried to act like he wasn’t bothered. An obviously forced non-plussed smile was fixed across his face, and he’d swaggered confidently over to his position on the right-flank.

But, sometimes, no matter how tough you try to act, the truth still shines through like the brightest beacon. Pete was utterly devastated.  

Taking a deep breath, Leo jogged over to the identical looking boy. Once he was standing behind him, he nervously raised a finger. Ready to tap Pete on the back.

For a moment his finger hovered in mid-air. He heard a couple of his temporary teammates’ mutter for him to “just leave Pete alone.” That “he’d be fine. He’s used to it.”

But it was too late. Leo’s finger had already made contact with Pete’s shoulder-blade.  

Slowly, Pete turned to face him.

“What?” Pete spat, unable to hide his annoyance at being disturbed.

Momentarily, Leo was rendered speechless. Once again, he was struck by just how much his father had once looked like him. It was like he was looking at a clone.

Pulling himself together, Leo tried to apologise to his Dad. Explained that it was he himself who had been responsible for the goal. That hurdling the tackle was the only sensible thing Pete could have done. His only option. It was the exact same thing that everyone else would have done, too.

His words seemed to have no effect on Pete whatsoever. For a few seconds, Leo’s Dad just stood motionless, staring off into space. Eventually, he gave a non-committal shrug of the shoulders. “Whatever,” he sighed wearily.

Sensing that Pete really didn’t want to talk about what had happened, Leo began striding to his position at right back. He’d taken a few steps away from Pete, when he suddenly stopped walking. He spun on his heels so that he was once again facing his father.

“What now?” huffed Pete.

“Why do you let him treat you like that?” asked Leo. 

While Leo’s apology may have failed to provoke much of a reaction from Pete, this question most certainly did. Albeit, not necessarily the reaction that Leo was expecting.

Immediately, Pete’s face started to turn tomato red and his body started to shake uncontrollably. Once again, his furious expression reminded Leo of the family connection between his father and grandfather. 

“What’s it got to do with you?” Pete growled, keeping his voice low. He didn’t want the others to notice he was rattled. “You don’t know me. Or my Dad. You have no idea what you’re talking about. Leave me alone.”

Pete took a menacing step towards Leo, as if attempting to ward the younger boy off.

But Leo stood his ground. For a reason he couldn’t fully explain, he didn’t feel intimidated in the slightest. He felt remarkably cool and composed.

“I do, actually,” he replied calmly. “I know exactly what it’s like. To feel like you’ve let your Dad down. Like you’re not good enough. To glance over at the slideline and see that look of disgust on his face every single time you make a mistake. Sometimes even when you don’t. It’s horrible. The worst feeling in the world.”

Once more, Pete looked like he was going to explode with rage. He took another step towards Leo. He was now within touching distance. Leo noticed that Pete’s right hand had balled into a fist. His knuckles white from where he was squeezing his hand so tightly. 

Yet Leo still wasn’t scared. Somehow, he knew – just knew – that Pete wasn’t going to punch him.

Sure enough, a second or two later the red flush of anger drained from Pete’s face. His right fist unclenched. He began to blink rapidly. “That’s… that’s exactly how I feel,” he stuttered. “Is your Dad a bit like mine, then?” he asked.

Leo tried to suppress a grin. But he couldn’t. “More than you could ever know,” he answered, chuckling slightly to himself.

“So… how do you deal with it?” Pete asked.

Leo paused. Mulled the question over in his mind, scratching at his cropped red hair as he did so. “I don’t,” he replied eventually. “Not really,” he added, poking his bottom lip over his top one. “I should… talk to him about it… I guess.”     

“I just wish,” Pete began, searching for the right words. “… I just wish… that he’d just let me play, you know? For fun. With a smile on my face. The way all the other boys do.” He made a sweeping gesture with his right arm. “Not moan at me every few minutes.”

Leo nodded his agreement. He knew exactly what Pete was talking about. Knew only too well.

“I love football, I really do,” Pete continued, becoming more animated now. This was the first time he’d ever voiced his frustrations aloud. He’d always believed that no-one would bother to listen to him. Or, if they did, they’d think he was moaning about nothing. 

Yet this strange, small boy who had appeared from seemingly out of nowhere appeared to get him. He understood. Or, at least, he seemed to. 

“But sometimes… just sometimes… I kind of… don’t love it.”

“Like when nothing you do is ever quite good enough,” stated Leo.

“Yeah. Exactly,” agreed Pete. “I reckon I’d play much better if he just left me alone,” he continued, nodding his head in Bernie’s direction. The coach was once again puffing on a cigarette. He already appeared calmer than he had been a few moments earlier. “Sometimes I just feel so… pressured, when he shouts at me.”

Once again, Leo nodded. But before he had a chance to respond, Jamie ordered them to stop “nattering like a couple of old ladies,” and get into their positions.

The second-half was about to begin.

Chapter 9 to be released on 12th August 2024

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